Speaker reflects on loss of self through occult practices (Part 2)

And indulging in things that I. I knew weren't right. I just kind of ignored it because I was like, well, I really. At this point, all I wanted was to get more acting opportunities. So that was the only thing that I cared about. In my mind, that was my version of meaning in life, was if I can make it as an actor. And so I Honestly, back then, like, if someone asked me to sell my soul to make it, I probably would have, which is scary to think about. But there was a time where that was honestly where I was at. I think part of that contributed to. Because I was doing tarot card readings as well. So I guess people don't realize, but when you do things like tarot card readings or witchy rituals or things of the occult, you are giving up your energy. And, you know, it's all about, like, if your intention. If you give permission or your intention to. To do that sort of work and work with those spirits, which are actually just demons, then they're gonna take things from you, and you're gonna feel like you don't have much of a soul left. And that was sort of where I was at. I was just very. Felt a little bit like a shel. Get what I could. And so then it came to a point where that guy who was sort of leading me down not the best path, I guess, thankfully ended things with me. I wasn't really expecting it. And I think that made me really look at myself for the first time in a while and be like, who have I become? Because I looked in the mirror genuinely and didn't recognize who I was and didn't like the decisions that I was making, the choices that I was making. My morals had just gone out the window. And I had a moment of really thinking about what it was about me that I felt I needed to change because I knew something needed to change.